Atlantic Business Channel

Harvey Wallbanger

Harvey Wallbanger is a management guru, an international man of mystery, and a damn fine cocktail. He currently labors in the bowels of a multinational corporate behemoth.

Recently by Harvey Wallbanger

Oct 22 2009, 1:57PM

Management Mumbo Jumbo: Lose Weight by Weighing Less

Hyper-glib purveyor of management gobbledygook Gary Hamel lifts our hopes when he quips at the Wall Street Journal blog: "I don't know if I'll write another book." From your mouth to God's ear, Gary.

He goes on to kill the joy, however, by offering his Cliff's Notes explanation of how a business can "outrun change." It's what we've come to expect from the man who has mastered the art of stringing together breezy advice ("deconstruct your orthodoxies") and fawning pseudo-case studies. You want to outrun change in today's economy? Piece of cake. Imagine alternative futures, include more diversity in your decision-making, learn to experiment quickly.

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Oct 14 2009, 1:59PM

University Discovers Incentives! Strangeness Ensues.

Little advances in free-market entrepreneurship among universities always make my heart go pitter-patter. It's like seeing a man sling off his leg braces at a church revival and start jitterbugging down the aisle to the collection plate. I don't doubt the process is much different, in fact -- some university provost or president attends a management seminar or reads a business book, has an epiphany about how people might actually -- just maybe, who woulda thunk it -- be self-interested problem-solvers, and the next thing you know he's spreading the gospel of incentives, or streamlined authorization processes, or continuous improvement.

Then, likely as not, no matter how he soft-peddles and tiptoes, no sooner does he breathe "incentivize" than the high-strung territorial hens who are his faculty and staff stir themselves up into a shrieking frenzy, and the next thing you know, people who have feuded for 20 years over who gets the office with the fewest rain-soaked ceiling tiles are joining arms and singing The Internationale.

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Feb 17 2009, 1:24PM

Trumped

Trump Entertainment Resorts has filed for bankruptcy a third time, after missing a December interest payment due bond holders, and just ahead of action by creditors seeking to put the company into involuntary bankruptcy. CEO Donald Trump has resigned, framing the issue not as incompetent management that made his company one of the worst performers in Atlantic City, but rather the fact that his board won't let him buy it. I suppose it would have been a sweet deal if he could have pulled it off, given that the company's market cap is down 99% from its August 2005 high, with its stock price in freefall this year.

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Feb 13 2009, 10:47AM

Maybe college is over-rated

Check out Marvin Olasky's interview with Charles Murray, who has written a book arguing that too many kids go to college. An excerpt:

"Upper-middle-class parents, when it comes to shopping for education for their children, act like drugged-up pop stars on Rodeo Drive. They buy by brand name, they don't check the quality of the product, they pay outrageous premiums, and they don't bother to check later to see if the product was actually delivered."

Can you imagine what college administrators would do if a great portion of their customers started opting for intensive vocational training and certification, rather than the four-year mish-mash that comprises the average university curriculum?

Feb 12 2009, 12:22PM

It's for the children

New regulations around the testing and sale of children's toys take effect this week, with predictable confusion. Thrift shop owners and small manufacturers are hollering that the testing costs will put them out of business, mini-bike makers and others are lobbying for exemptions, and the Consumer Product Safety Commission has issued guidelines that, so far as I can tell, fail to answer a simple question like: "Do all children's products require testing?"

What's likely to happen is that the toy megaliths who started this mess by importing toxic junk from China will be able to comply with the new laws, substituting chemicals with as yet undetermined toxicity for chemicals proven to be toxic, while small toymakers -- often those using wood and simple, non-toxic stains, will go out of business.

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Feb 12 2009, 9:07AM

"Uh-oh"

Following up on my earlier post about the self-serving spin generated by the Peanut Corporation of America, the company at the center of investigation into widespread salmonella contamination, The New York Times reports that not only did PCA switch testing companies because it didn't like how its previous tester was finding too many instances of contamination, it actually shipped product before getting test results back.

 

"Uh-oh," is the quote attributed to one of the plant's managers, after hearing that tests of the already shipped product revealed salmonella.

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Feb 10 2009, 6:30AM

Hamel don't hurt 'em

From The Wall Street Journal: management book faves of CEOs like Novartis's Daniel Vasella and Snap-On's Nicholas Pinchuk. Thankfully, none of them lists Who Moved My Cheese? Perhaps the most astute observation comes from Progress Energy CEO Bill Johnson, who writes: ". . . most mass market business books are of little practical value." Johnson, like other CEOs surveyed, is old-school, a Drucker fan.


What's hilarious is that the author responsible for some of the most egregious business schlock on the book market, Gary Hamel, blogs for the WSJ. In conjunction with the aforementioned piece he's offering his own recommendations for "Management Revolutionaries." This is an allusion to Hamel's dreadful Leading the Revolution, which in addition to praising the strategic mind of convicted WorldCom felon Bernie Ebbers, spends dozens of pages extolling the "pro-entrepreneurship culture" of Enron.


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Feb 4 2009, 10:12AM

Accounting for higher ed

"As an industry," explain the authors of a new report on college spending, "higher education still has not made the transition from cost accounting to cost accountability." According to the healthily data-obsessed Delta Project, while universities have enacted double-digit tuition increases in recent years, the bulk of this additional revenue did not go to student instruction. Instead the funds were largely diverted to research, non-instructional student "services" ( a category which often includes recruiting costs), and extra-university activities like conferences and extension services.


It's not inherently bad, of course, for a school to spend extra dollars on something other than salaries and office supplies for teaching faculty. More dollars in the classroom don't necessarily translate to better learning, whereas more dollars for research or technology upgrades can improve what and how students learn. Still, in a time of belt-tightening, customers may start to wonder whether all the added expense is necessary.

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Jan 29 2009, 5:27PM

Punitive justice

While plenty of news media attention has been paid to Attorney General nominee Eric Holder's affinity for criminals who aren't CEOs, what worries business leaders is his authorship in the Clinton Justice Department of the infamous "Holder Memo." The memo encourages companies to withdraw legal support from employees accused by the federal government of crimes, lest they be considered "uncooperative" and face further punitive measures from Uncle Sam themselves. If you believe the government is wrongly prosecuting your employees, in other words, you'll pay a price if you fight back.


Arlen Specter and Ed Meese explained in a recent Wall Street Journal editorial that Holder's action at Justice trickled down to other agencies: "Similar policies were adopted by the Internal Revenue Service, the Environmental Protection Agency, the Securities and Exchange Commission, the Department of Housing and Urban Development, and others." Why haven't more news outlets -- and more importantly, Judiciary Committee members who yesterday voted to send Holder's nomination to the Senate -- focused on this aspect of Holder's past? Because fugitive billionaires and Puerto Rican terrorists are sexier.


Government abuse -- especially the selective sort that targets companies unpopular with or critical of an administration -- was a big fear in large companies during the Clinton/Gore years. Will Holder's likely ascent signal a return to that era?

Jan 29 2009, 5:15PM

Endowment envy

While most university endowments took a hit in 2008, the richest managed to eke out a positive return on the year. Their secret? A blend of alternative investments like private equity M&A funds, real estate, oil and gas, and even distressed debt, combined with a relatively smaller investment in domestic equities. The Commonfund Institute reveals that other universities tried to play the alternatives game as well, but invested far more in a bucket of alternatives that includes derivatives and hedge funds. Endowment funds with the least to lose, those with under $10 million in assets, though they invested relatively little in alternative strategies, put most of it in this arguably riskiest category. Funds with over $1 billion in assets, meanwhile, spread their investments far more evenly across alternative strategies.


So what's the lesson? Are the investment pros at Harvard, et al. simply smarter, wiser, or luckier? Given that the 3- and 5-year returns at top university endowments also outpace the pack, maybe it doesn't matter. As Milton Friedman would say, what matters is the predictive power of the model. So I wonder if smaller colleges might be better off paying the big funds a fee to do their investing for them. I suspect unloading the bulk of their less effective endowment staff would more than pay for it.

Jan 28 2009, 7:50AM

Football is Dangerous Business

Football is bad for your health. I'm not talking about those of us who will watch the Superbowl with one hand in a bag of chips and the other clutching a beer. I mean the people we'll be watching, many of whose bodies will sustain the equivalent of a car wreck this coming Sunday -- on top of the many concussions and breaks they've already experienced this season.


This is nothing new, of course, but results from a recently released (and not coincidentally timed) study from the Boston University School of Medicine indicate that the damage may be worse than previously thought. Examining the brains of dead, relatively young former NFL players, scientists discovered damage similar to "what might be found in the brain of an 80-year-old with dementia."


Football is bad for your health, but it is good for the bottom line, which might explain why the National Football League's response to this latest study is reminiscent of the best work from tobacco company flaks in their heyday:

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Jan 23 2009, 12:06PM

Full frontal disclosure

Several news agencies report that the Securities and Exchange Commission is investigating, inquiring, reviewing, and/or -- my favorite -- "probing" Apple's recent disclosures about the health of its messianic CEO, Steve Jobs. It's not that they "have seen evidence of wrongdoing," an anonymous source explained to Bloomberg. They're just, you know, looking into it. 


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Jan 22 2009, 12:00PM

Customer focused companies?

Heartland Payment Systems, which processes payments for -- depending on which story you read, 175,000 or 250,000 small businesses across the U.S., has discovered that hackers have been using an embedded program to extract customer credit and debit card numbers for months, making this potentially the largest such heist in American history, potentially topping 100 million numbers. Heartland characterizes its months-long security lapse as "an unfortunate incident."

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